Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Who is this imposter?

I have been trying to figure out my new identity.  

You know what I mean... 

Where your life has changed and you are no longer who you used to be...  

I USED to be a newlywed who was moving to strange lands (Oklahoma - there are no trees in Oklahoma!) and foreign countries (Japan - yep, for three years).  That woman was young and naive and was learning how to live with her new husband (which was sometimes difficult!) and was trying to make new friends (which was also sometimes difficult!).  

This picture was overexposed when we got it (Hey!  It was the '80s!).  But I liked it, so I kept it.  We had been married two months when this was taken.


I USED to be a mom of young children and I could talk about strollers or which formula worked best for my kids.  That mom used to have lots of friends with children who were the same age and we could get together over coffee while our children played in the "balls" at McDonald's.  We took our kids to Disney during this phase and we would love to see the "magic" on their faces.

This picture is of Michael and Jessica before Allison.  They are so darn cute!  Jessica is my daughter that just got married!  They grow up so fast.  Do you like my movie star sunglasses?

I USED to be a working mom who had to "corral" my sweet babies in the morning, get them a bagel and drop them off at school at 7:00 am so that I could make it into downtown Atlanta by 8:00 am.  Then I would leave work at 5:00 to rush home to pick them up at daycare by 6:00 to avoid paying $1.00 a minute/per child after 6:00.  I would have to quickly think of something for dinner because they were starving!  And we had to do homework!  (Lots of exclamation points because those were stressful times!)  But I liked working because I was "me".  Not a mom/wife/sister/daughter... Just "me".  If I was successful, it was because I worked hard.  I could make people laugh and I enjoyed the friendships.


I USED to be a mom of teenagers who were not turning in their homework or not telling me about career day at high school because they would rather have their teeth cleaned daily at the dentist than be seen with their mom!  We took our kids to Disney during this time and we would love to see the "magic" on their faces (do you see a pattern evolving?).  Professionally, my work life had begun to consume me and I rose in the ranks.  I enjoyed the "control" and "leadership" that my new work life involved.  The people that I worked with for 11 years became, in some case, life-long friends.  People that I could count on.  People that watched my children grow up.  People that cared about me.  This was probably the most satisfying professional time in my life to date.  I do not think it was my shinning moment as a mom.  I was working long hours and was quite often grumpy.  It is amazing what God does to get our attention, isn't it?  Boy, he got my attention in a BIG way...

Our family, including a niece at Disney in 2000.

Today, I am a wife, a mother of grown children, a mother-in-law (that's new!), a student, and a contract worker.  The children are out on their own.  The contract worker is not as satisfying as I had hoped.  And the hubby works an opposite shift so we are not always together when I am off of work.   Now can you understand why I am trying to figure out my next move, professionally and personally?  I read lots of blogs and most of those that I enjoy are moms with small children just talking about their daily lives.   I am also writing about my daily life, but I no longer have the topic of motherhood cornered.  I especially enjoy the blogs that deal with DIY or home improvements.  (You know how I love being creative!)  I love to cook.  I love to travel.  I love to create things.  I am starting to dabble with my "What Not To Wear" wardrobe and I'm actually interested in some fashion!  (Wouldn't that make for a good blog post if I chronicled me throwing out my Christmas vests???)  I love to make people laugh.  I love to help people.  I would love to have sponsors on my blog so I can get paid to write!    So, what does an empty-nester talk about on her blog?  What does an empty-nester do with her time?  

Any suggestions?  I would love it if you left me some comments!  I never get any.  (That was a shameful "sympathy plug"...)

Keep creating friends! 

Tracy